Anecdotal Bloopers In Call Center

Scenario 1

Agent: Mr. ****, we didn't receive a payment from you on time and as a result, a past due fee was already assessed on your account.

Caller: I don't give a f*** care, Obama will fix it.



Comment: Adik ka, Sir.

Scenario 2

Agent: We only process your payment once we receive it. And we understand that you sent your payment a week earlier before the due date, however Mr. ****, we don't have control over the delivery of your payment.

Caller: And so do I. I don't have control over the delivery of my payment. I'm NOT the President of the United States!



Comment: The caller has a point. A lame one. Adik.

Scenario 3

Agent: OK, let me repeat what I just said. (And she did.)

Caller: What!? Do what now?

Agent: (Sighing after pressing the mute button.) Mr. ****, I was telling you…

Caller: What fees?

Agent: (On mute) Mamatay ka na sanang matanda ka!



Comment: Bad agent. Anyway it was so funny!

Scenario 4

Fernand Yim: I was in KFC, in line for my lunch. I was next to this beautiful African-American. She really has a beautiful butt. Arg, couldn't help it but noticed that.

Elve Jane: What a maniac.

Fernand Yim: Hey, I was appreciating, not lusting!



Comment: No comment.

Scenario 5

Agent: What city and state, please.

Caller: What?

Agent: What city and state, please.

Caller: What?

Agent: What city…and state…please.

Caller: What?

Agent: (Now irate) What city! City! City!



Comment: What a st**** caller.

A Friend Said Goodbye

A friend told me goodbye last night

The message was thickened with a thousandfold of hidden messages in it

However, I was not that stupid not to know

So I told him right from the blades of my tongue,

You want to die? Go on, die!

Don’t wait for me to stop you ‘cos I won’t stop you.

I would let you cut yourself so blood could be freed after many lame years of running into the same lame veins you have.

For sure it would take some minutes of pain and suffering,

Tears would join the smelly fresh blood,

Sweat would be there as well,

It was as if you still feared of the end of your life.

Death surrounded you so long before.

Not because it had found you

But because you searched for it and you took it home with you.

And don’t call me friend because we are not friends anymore.

Because if I was your friend, you would listen to me.

You wouldn’t just let me rant on and on when you always knew you never had ears for my words.

I pitied you so much.

I pitied you because you had never appreciated my being a friend to you.

Well, goodbye and good luck.

P.S. Don’t make another suicide note addressed to me. I would not be reading them.

Goodbye was enough to let me know that I was not a friend enough for you.

Goodbye.

——————————————–

The above poem or whatever you call it was written last year. Forgot the date, though. It was written by someone I know so much. Forgot his name, though. Arg. Anyway when I was reading this again, while I was cleaning my old stuffs at home, I felt that weird feeling again that I am not sure if it was good one or bad. Sure thing was, it put some chill up my spine. It was like a ghost was standing right there, behind me. As if I believe in ghosts. #